Strange things I've noticed so far

Another list, sorry about any repeats

too many women have no eyebrows

lots of women choose to draw on eyebrows, and they are painfully obvious drawings

too many women have chin hair

too many people are cross-eyed

too many kids look like the products of mothers who drank a lot during pregnancy

the verb “must” is overused e.g. “must I cook?” or “you must go to the tuck shop”

the bed-to-other-pieces-of-funiture ratio is strangely high

it's no big deal to send your kid to grandma's house – and then never see him again

no one wants to be dirty or get their things dusty, kids put their bags behind them on their chairs at school so they are off the dirty floor

technology has advanced too fast since the end of Apartheid and no one in the villages knows how to effectively use a computer

they don't believe rural areas exist in America, despite my stories and pictures to convince them otherwise

if it's cold, the women will wrap a blanket around themselves like a giant towel over their work clothes and continue on with their day

pop or soda is a “cool drink” here

cool drinks are often sold in 1.25 liter glass bottles, with a deposit required at the shop

everyone loves to sing and dance, and will bust out their moves at the slightest provocation

for such a conservative society, the traditional Tswana dancing costumes are surprisingly revealing of both genders

teachers are “educators” and students are “learners”

no one knows what a “text” is, it's called a SMS

there a a LOT of bootleg Chinese DVDs and BluRays floating around, usually a disk with 6-10 movies on it

people here are scared of everything: lightning, snakes, strong winds, change, lizards, mice, and all these things have been around longer than them! So I don't understand the fear

everyone gets their mail delivered to the school and sent home with their kids

Hopefully I can get a few pictures up next time, I have a sneaky one of the bearded lady but can't figure out how to get it from my phone to my computer yet.

The end of October

The biggest thing I'm adjusting to this month is the lack of Halloween.  Everyone is very confused when I try to ask about it, and the idea of wearing a costume is so foreign and absurd that I was accused of making the whole thing up.  My heart broke a little.  I'm going as Carmen Sandiego, and you, reader, can guess where in the world I am. :)

Last week I continued in my role as the AA of the Primary School by entering grades into the computer program to submit to the Department of Education.  We're already a week or so late, but the teachers are using the toytoy as an excuse for not having their work completed on time.  I proposed a “Teacher of the Month” award and “Student of the Month” Treasure Box to encourage everyone, it was received with praise but we'll see if anything actually gets put into action.  I've amazed everyone with my computer skills, with the fact that I type with more than 2 fingers and don't have to constantly look at where my fingers are.  David gave me a spreadsheet to make and told me to “work my magic.”  I got a hug when I put the school letterhead on the spreadsheet.  I'm going to become so egotistical with all the praise I get here, I'll have to take up soccer so my lack of skills and talent will keep me humble.

I refuse make copies for teachers, they don't much like me for that, but I just show them how to do it and tell them to be self-sufficient.  David knows he needs to get a new, real AA, and we've talked to one of the Kindergarten teachers about practicing computer skills with me after school so she can help out more.  

At the Middle School I would be helping the AA enter grades, except the teachers haven't turned in any from last term yet.  I fuss at them a little, and turn it into a motivational staff meeting.  Remember, South Africans are amazing at blocking out what they don't want to hear, so it turns into a discussion about what can “we” do to encourage learners to behave and do their homework.  We decide on an assembly and spend 3 hours lecturing the kids out in the sun about their risky sexual behavior.  Yeah, I'm confused by this train of thought too.  It's a heat wave, literally like 100 degrees F, and we're in the sun, at least 3 learners pass out and have to be carried into the offices to be refreshed.  I tried to spin my speech a little more positive and tell the kids that we educators are all here because we care and we're very willing to answer any questions they might have.  I stress the importance of education and how far it can take them.  I had to eat crow later when I couldn't help some learners with their homework and had to send them to the encyclopedias at the library.  Then I had to explain what an encyclopedia is and how to look up information in it. 

Finally, a few teachers turned in some grades from the 2.5 months of Term 3.  They have 2 assignments.  Two assignments were all the kids did in two and a half months, and all that will determine their grade.  I'm astonished, but the AA is so stressed about the deadline that he immediately starts to work.  I help, and since I can type so much faster, especially with the number pad, I did so and  emasculated him.  He was a little put off at me the first day but changed his mind when he realized how much faster this would get done.  He started showing off my speed to teachers as they handed in marks and said we'd have a typing race with Mavis Beacon after all the marks are entered.  We stayed about 2.5 hours after school today and are now waiting on teachers to submit their grades.

I dealt with the excitement of a mouse in my room over the weekend, I spent one night in the house only to get woken up by my mom at 5:30 in the morning.  I decided I had to face this mouse and fight for my room at 5:31am.  I put out poison, moved things around, and saw him run out under my door.  A rag stuffed in the door frame is the best solution I can come up with for now, my mom says we'll eventually replace my door, since it's supposed to be an interior door and my room opens up to the great outdoors.  I'm not holding my breath for that though. 

Before I waste any more time let me get to the most exciting part of my week – the Post Office!!  I'm using my Primary School's address and they go check the mail once a week.  I got one package from my sister of dry erase markers.  I was happy to get mail but confused because the schools here use chalk.  I also got 2 notices that I had packages that I needed to pay customs on at the Post Office.  On Tuesday the Middle School Principal, AA and I stopped to pick my things up and drop off 4 letters I've been carrying around for weeks.  I ended up with 7 giant envelopes of mail!!  I was a little embarrassed to be carrying around that many bubble envelopes, but so thrilled to get care packages!!  I carefully carried them home, at the gate Lebo and one of his little friends helped me carry them into my room.  I knew there'd be some school supplies so I opened the biggest envelope and gave them a coloring book as thanks.  I also found some laminated poster board to use with my dry erase markers.  I don't even have words to describe how happy I was, I was laughing to myself all night.  I took 2 markers and a poster into the house so Lebo and I could draw and practice math in the magic of dry erase.  My sister also sent me candy, spices, instant mashed potatoes, more school supplies, kids books, math teaching materials, a purple sunhat, beads and thread for friendship bracelets, and stuff to make balloon animals.  I want to wait for a special occasion to show Lebo those.  Thanks, Trina, I'll get pictures of his reaction to them. 

One of the packages was from my dear friend Dr. Skaggs, I think I've mentioned her before.  She and her kids had plastered the outside of the envelope with stickers and decorations, and stuffed it full of pencils, pens, kazoos, candy, a little Lego boat and calendar magnet for my fridge next year.   Thanks, Dr. Skaggs.

I'm feeling more enthusiastic every day that I can make a difference here, especially when the learners come up to me with questions and want to learn to use the computers.  Between the support I've got here and at home, the positive changes I know I can make here and the smiles of the children at school, I'm only too willing to get to work and prove myself an effective and passionate Peace Corps Volunteer. 

I just opened my Starbursts and discovered they have a slight garlic taste, which just makes me laugh all over again.

Every day is an Adventure!

This has become my mantra, something to help me laugh at the absurdities that I deal with on a daily basis in my family and my community. 

Last week was Spring Break, and I had a pretty low-key break.  I went shopping in a small local town one day all my myself, which was fun.  Another day I was able to drive with some educators to my official Shopping Town, Vryburg, and spend some time with fellow PCVs and do some shopping that the smaller town doesn't handle (like shampoo for white people hair).  I love seeing my adopted dad, he always calls out “Hi gorgeous!” when he sees me, and had me laughing all day, he's the funniest guy in the PC and one of my all time favorites.  So it was a great day.

I was told during the week that the Rural Development Committee (remember the toytoy guys?) were going to strike next week and block the roads to get the government's attention for our village's need of a tarred road.  The current “road” is a wide ribbon of fine sand, a few gravels and lots of donkey droppings that makes a car shake like a space ship leaving the Earth's atmosphere for 10 miles. 

Over the weekend I was assured that they wouldn't strike, and the schools would continue as normal Monday.  But wait, everyday is an adventure.

Monday started out normal, it wasn't until school was supposed to start that we realized all the teachers who live outside the village (about 75% of our educators) weren't at school yet.  The RDC Strikes!! They were stopping traffic on the main road into the village, preventing the educators' bus and private cars from coming to school.  So my Primary Principal is pretty upset that we don't have nearly enough teachers to handle all the kids and will have to dismiss early.  This disappointment was quickly overshadowed by the members of the RDC BREAKING INTO THE SCHOOL GROUNDS to try and convince teachers to join the strike and steal the tires that edged the playground to burn.  To the credit of our teachers, no one left, but the stress level doubled.  We fed the kids an early lunch and sent them home.  Since the roads are blocked and we have no deliveries we have no food for kids tomorrow, and had to cancel school UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

Home early, I did laundry and tried to talk to everybody who I passed on the way to the tuck shop about the strikes and what they knew.  Everyone said “Don't worry, you are safe.  Stay home, you are safe.”  So I stayed home all week, and made everyday it's own adventure.

Tuesday I watched 3 seasons of Arrested Development and laughed all day.

Wednesday I tried to use logic on my family about how the dog didn't deserve to be BEATEN BLOODY for eating the fresh eggs when he never has before, but this brand new puppy still has shell around his mouth.  I was accused of just loving the dog too much to want to see him beaten and advised to go to my room to spare myself.  I'm anxious to see the next time some eggs get eaten while the dog is tied up on the other side of the yard.   

Thursday I made myself drink some instant coffee in an attempt to acclimate myself to it, since people here drinks tea and coffee like it's their job.  I've almost gotten used to most teas, and coffee was a pleasant surprise.  I know it's instant and by definition, terrible, but it wasn't as bad as tea.  I have to add a little sugar, but my 1 scoop is nothing compared to most locals' 3 scoops.  I was very happy with this adventure. 

Friday I spent texting with my sister is America trying to secretly diagnose what mental problem my little host brother here has.  We decided a mild form of autism and I should not interfere but keep my voice low and steady when he's beating himself in the head from frustration. 

Saturday was pretty great, I went to visit 2 other PCVS at a nearby village where we watched a Rugby game, grilled out and attempted to learn how to play Cribbage.  I feel older just for playing that.  Transportation was creative on my part, and I was glad to meet some lovely ladies who took one look at me “Are you the American Peace Corps Volunteer?” and told the cab driver exactly where I lived in my village, right down to the color of the roof and size of our sheep herd.  The funny thing is my host mom didn't recognize their names when I told her about it.  Another adventure in village life!

Today, Sunday, I did more laundry and have been lazy in my room all day.  I cleaned out my school bag and will at least go in the morning to see if the strikes continue and what new adventures the new day will have in store for me. 

Things you wouldn't be jealous of

A few people stateside have mentioned how jealous they are of my adventures.  I'm a little homesick today and thought I'd show you what you are NOT missing out on.

Things you wouldn't be jealous of

how slow EVERYTHING is. Whether it's deciding what to eat for dinner, getting to town, walking down the street, or writing their own name, South Africans move like molasses

the random animals who are always crossing the road

the potholes on the paved roads and the fishtailing as you fly down the dirt roads

all internet data bundles are VERY limited

pit latrines and pee buckets

random and unexplained illnesses, bug bites and sunburns

every TV screen has weird discoloration or distorted edges

the difference between American English and South African English – the cars have a bonnet and a boot, I send SMSs, apply for a job with a CV, use the pit latrine, it's “chips” not “fries” etc.

constantly reminding yourself to speak slowly and use easy words

needing to explain simple concepts to educated people

how many protests and strikes my village has already hosted since I've been here

missing voices of friends and family from home

14% sales tax

so much starch in every meal

handwashing everything!

I'm sure there's more to come in future posts, keep an eye out!

The end of September

Today was a long day

Usually I feel the need to write something about a week, but today was as long as week all by itself.

Today was the last day of school before the week off for Spring Break.  (Spring Break in October still feels weird to me too.)  I knew that the schools I volunteer at would knock off early, so I didn't waste time packing a lunch this morning.  At the Primary School, where I act as the Administrative Assistant, I spent a couple of hours helping teachers get recording sheet printed and ready to enter grades so report cards can come out soon.  It's already past the deadline, but everyone is on African Time after all.  Educators and learners were dismissed before 10am.

At the Middle School, I gave the Principal letters I'd had some 7^th and 8^th Graders write to classes in America for her to mail.  The learners had already been dismissed and were walking home with their school lunches bagged up.  A few girls caught me to ask if they could visit me or go to church with them.  I put them off rather indirectly, I'm learning to like this culture.  The few educators who were around the last couple of days have all been carrying around sticks or whips, but I didn't see any physical punishment.  Several older boys were sweeping the walks, and when I asked what they had done to deserve this they told me they liked it, better sweeping than doing nothing, like they are in class. 

I said my goodbyes and happy holidays to the educators and made plans to come back Monday and help paint the exterior of the school buildings.  The Principal surprised me with a bar of chocolate as she said goodbye. 

I walked home to find my 4^th Grade brother has a note from his teacher.  Despite the holiday, his class has to go to school on Monday and Tuesday to make up for lost time when the teacher was sick last week.  This delays his plans to go spend the break with his mom, dad and brother, who live in a nearby town. 

I said hello to my mom and headed to my room to enjoy my day off.  Mom pops her head in and says I must come make toast in their new toaster.  It's more like a sandwich/panini maker, but I dutifully came in and make toast.  But you can't just make one thing here, I had to made eggs too and only just managed to get out of eating leftovers from last night too.  As I finished eating, Lebo and I heard glass break.  Mom was washing dishes and dropped a glass.  I said I'd help clean it up, which morphed into mom showing me into the bedrooms with the broom so I could “start to sweep in here, then that other room, then that side, then that other side.”  I admit, I wasn't very enthusiastic or thorough sweeping her house.  I quickly retreated to my own room to enjoy a book. 

A man has been at the house all week working on the landscaping.  I stepped out a minute to see the dirt and go to the toilet, where I passed my mom busy at laundry.  A flippant comment, “You stay busy, huh?” lead to me having to hang up the laundry on the line.  Not my laundry either.  So mom will clean and reorganize my room and I will help with chores in her house.  This doesn't really make sense to me but if a South African doesn't want to hear something they are amazing at blocking it out.  I really enjoy feeling like a part of the family but not when I it comes to chores.  Largely because there's never been a Please or Thank You.  In any language. 

Back in my room, I finished the 4^th book of a 7 book series, but I don't have the other 3 and feel at a loss about what to read next.  The Game of Thrones will be hard to top, so I chose a silly little romance so I wont be too disappointed in the story.  Lebo came in and asked if I wanted to play.  He's a fanatic about card games, so we get along famously, except he frustrates me when he makes a silly mistake or “forgets” an inconvenient rule.  His favorite is Go Fish with Crazy 8s a close second. 

He insisted on watching a stupid South African comedy.  I'd seen the beginning and I've never seen anything worse.  Until I saw the end today.  Really, I've yet to see a decent movie made in SA.  But I am watching things endorsed by a 9-year-old.  We switched to Terminator 3, but the disk skipped so bad it was like the movie was fast forwarding.  Lebo took the disk out and ran to the kitchen with it.  He returned to say it needed a few minutes in the fridge to help stop the skipping.  DVDs in the fridge?  My Facebook status about it sparked a lively conversation about weird things we've learned in SA.  Apparently condom lubrication is a great cleaning solution.  There's your pearl of wisdom for the day, reader, and you are welcome.

Back in the player and on screen, the movie really isn't skipping any less, but I don't mention it.  I'm busy trying to see the end of T3, Lebo is busy trying to build a house of cards, and mom is busy cooking us dinner.  I wanted to go to my room, I still have leftovers from the dinner she sent me yesterday, but I thought since I worked today I'd eat.  I hardly ate half my plate, meals here are huge, and Lebo ate about as much as me.  This caused mom to threaten to give him a spate again tomorrow, which I accidentally walked in on once and thanked God my mom never did that to me. 

I helped Lebo with the dinner dishes and say 'goodnight' before I was asked to do anything more.  Mom is expecting a couple of her sons to come today or tomorrow for a weekend visit, but I was too tired to stay awake and wait for them.  In my room I tidied up a bit, took my bath and got ready for bed with this blog entry.  I think I hear a car honking outside, maybe it's one of my host brothers, but I'm in my pj's and wont be going out any more tonight.  I'll meet the family tomorrow, after I'm rested. 

On paper it doesn't seem like a very long day, but when I think back to this morning, it's hard to believe it was just 12 hours ago that I was at school.  I'm glad tomorrow is Saturday and I can sleep in.  At least until mom wakes me up to check on me.  South African parenting is something else.